A Three-Part Series on Sports, Activities & Academics
Competitive Youth Sports & Activities Gone Wild
The Real Value of Youth Sports & Activities
Academics: Grades & School Work
In our country, we are blessed to have wonderful youth sports programs for kids that do so much more than teach children skills for playing sports. Sports and activities teach kids about life while providing health benefits, increased prosocial behavior, improved emotional and psychological health, increased academic performance, and overall sense of well-being.
We loved watching (coaching and team mom too!) our boys play different sports as they grew up and continued to watch them play baseball and hockey in college. However, as we discussed last week, it is important to maintain the proper perspective when it comes to competitive sports and activities, so that it remains a fun learning experience.
Perspective is Key
The likelihood that your child will play a professional sport, participate in the Olympics, or perform on Broadway is less than .03%. But should that deter us from encouraging our children to strive to be in that .03%? The answer is a resounding NO! Competitive sports and activities provide a huge value in the young lives of our children with long lasting benefits that will help them succeed in their adult lives. And should “lightning strike” in the process of benefiting from their competitive sport/activity and they get recruited that’s fantastic. Just don’t expect it or lose perspective.
Whether its football, choir, soccer, debate team or dance, all recreational and competitive youth sports and activities provide tremendous benefits that last a lifetime. Based upon our experience with Trevor and Alex, here is our take on some of the lasting life lessons that we’ve been able to teach and appreciate over the years.
The Thrill of Victory and Agony of Defeat – The inherent part of all competition is that you will win some and lose some. While winning is fun, it’s the losses that make winning even sweeter. Being able to humbly appreciate winning and overcoming the disappointment of losing are wonderful parenting opportunities to teach into those moments. How do you appreciate winning while avoiding the pitfalls of arrogance? What are some experiences you had as a child when you had to bounce back from major disappointment?
The Real World – Life isn’t fair and neither are competitive sports/activities… at least not all the time. Referees make mistakes. Judges make subjective decisions that don’t go your way. Coaches have bad days and some are just plain biased. The lesson we taught our boys is to not be a victim of unfair situations or circumstances. You can’t control how others behave, so think of what you can do (control) to make the most positive impact. Knowing that you did everything possible to reach your potential provides positive motivation in battling unfairness.
There is no “I” in TEAM – This favorite mantra of many coaches isn’t necessarily true. We taught Trevor and Alex to help the team be successful by taking personal responsibility for their individual performance. This doesn’t mean its ok to be a “ball hog” or berate others on the team for not performing well. Rather, it’s about leading by example while encouraging and helping others on the team to succeed. It’s kind of like the airplane safety instruction: Please put your oxygen mask on first, so you can help others!
Health, Talent and Cognitive Development – The value of exercise, getting enough sleep and eating healthy is obvious to everyone. Teaching and living out those habits and routines early, as a family, will set your children on the path to a lifelong healthy lifestyle. Similarly, developing the ability to play piano, for example, will become a treasured talent that will nourish the soul long after the competitions and concerts are over.
Learning to be patient and persevere, thinking about creative ways to reach your potential, and finding focus through effort and concentration are all examples of ways that sports/activities enhance the cognitive development of your growing child. There are many studies out there (most recently from Northwestern) that point to children succeeding academically when they are challenged physically and creatively.
Youth sports/activities provide a wonderful vehicle for parenting as long as you maintain a proper perspective and focus on the opportunities to teach into the moment. Consequently, this also means that you need to the be the example and live to the standard that you want your to child internalize as they pursue their sport/activity. Speaking poorly of judges/coaches, throwing a temper tantrum when your kid is benched or the team loses because of another player, are not behaviors we want our children to emulate. Demonstrating patience, appreciating your child’s effort, and enjoying the process has more value in the long run than any ribbon or trophy.
Blessings to your Family,
Shelly and Rich
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