When our boys were young, we mistakenly thought our summers would eventually get less busy as they got older.  Between summer vacations, sports, camps, and family visits, our summer schedule got completely booked. While all of it was very exciting and fun, we made sure to always schedule Family Fun Night in the midst of all the summer busyness.

Family Fun Night is a purposeful evening dedicated to enjoying time together as a family. This means we avoid discussing school, the boys’ sports, home projects, or using the time to address parenting issues, even during peaceful moments. The focus is entirely on having fun together, with the aim of strengthening our relationships and enhancing our family identity.

We picked Friday nights as our Family Fun Night, because Rich was usually home on Fridays if he was traveling on business during the week and there were no conflicts with sports or other upcoming weekend events or projects.  It was also a great way to end the week and was something to look forward to.  Sometimes we planned our night during the week and sometimes Friday night during dinner.

Over the years our Family Fun Nights have evolved.  Here is a snapshot of the characteristics and what our Family Fun Nights looked like for us at various ages:

Ages 3-5 

Chutes & Ladders, Candyland, and other age appropriate board games.

Playing Legos or building new train layouts for Thomas the Tank Engine.

Drawing pictures of fun characters from books, videos, and, of course, sports.

Family Fun Night was about 2 hours and then an hour of wind down with baths and bedtime stories.

During the week (CouchTime!) we would figure out what we would do for Family Fun Night. Notice, no screens!

Ages 6-11

Special movie night with treats, blankets, and all the lights in the house turned off.

Cards, Game of Life, Monopoly and other longer lasting board games – sometimes these would extend to an additional night!

Family Fun Night was about 3-4 hours depending if the boys could sleep in on Saturday. Getting to stay up later on Friday night was an additional treat.

Each week, the boys took turns planning Family Fun Night. There were no complaints if someone didn’t enjoy the chosen activity, as everyone would have their chance to plan in the following week. This system allowed each boy to feel personally invested in creating a meaningful family experience.

Ages 12 +

Dinner and movie out or Pizza/Movie marathon (We love movies!).

Card games, board games, and video games.

Play sports in the front yard or over at the school – Boys v. Mom & Dad and other team combinations.

Family Fun Nights are less structured and more spontaneous.  Instead of Friday night, we might do a Saturday afternoon/evening but we would still call it family night.  This would allow for a longer Family Fun Night.

During the week we would still take turns planning Family Fun Night, but sometimes we would all just come to a mutual consensus.

The goal is always to enjoy each other’s company, to intentionally set aside time to be together, and to protect our Family Identity. This time should act as a relationship oasis for a few hours—free from judgment, evaluation, or the burdens of past distractions and mistakes—where the bonds of trust and family identity can be nurtured.

Ultimately, Family Fun Night should:

  • Build relational trust and security in the bonds of the family.
  • Build memories that are “treasures of the heart”.
  • Help to teach being thoughtful in the planning, thinking of others and putting differences aside for the benefit of the entire family having fun together.
  • Build strong family identity which helps to reduce the pull of negative peer pressure and societal pressure.

What does your Family Fun Night look like this summer?

Blessings to your family,

Shelly and Rich