We have a very cute Mallard duck family that lives in our neighborhood. We often see them in the late spring, tending and leading their fuzzy ducklings near the water feature at the entrance to our community. As the “parent ducks” go back and forth from the water feature, the little ones follow in a perfect line behind them. For these ducklings, it’s instinctual for them to follow with complete discipline and obedience. We never see these ducklings not “obey” their parents. They just follow without challenge, no meltdowns and no stubbornness or wayward attitudes. If only parenting our own darling, fuzzy little ones was as easy as that!
We’ve had the privilege of walking alongside many parents over the years who, like us, found that “winging it” (pun intended), when it comes to raising their kids was not going to lead to a great outcome for their children or family life. It takes an intentional and consistent strategy to achieve the outcomes we desire for our children.
The inspiration, wisdom and practical lessons we learned as young parents encouraged us during seasons when raising our boys was challenging, difficult and exhausting. Thankfully, we had blessed parenting moments that made all the tough parenting moments worthwhile; blessed and affirming moments when the fruit of your parenting reveals itself in wonderfully unexpected ways.
This past May, a couple from a parenting class we led 16 years ago shared this letter with us, written by their seventeen year old son as he was about to graduate from high school:
“Thank you again for instilling great values in me! Being older and less naïve I see some pretty poor parenting and kids not following FTO (First Time Obedience). I wouldn’t have changed anything about the way you parented me! In fact you guys have done such a great job I would 100% want to use Parenting from The Tree of Life. You guys have instilled amazing values of respect, hard work, thankfulness, selflessness, humility and love for others…”
We received permission to share this part of their son’s love letter so that it might offer you a bit of encouragement in your parenting process. It is a parent’s blessing when you receive confirmation from your children that you did a great job despite all the rough days when your parenting went off the rails. As this video conveys…
“Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it.”- Proverbs 22:6
Blessings to you and your family this Holiday Season,
Shelly and Rich Howard