Do you have a 4 year old that uses a tablet or 13 year old that is glued to their phone? If so, you have a Screenager!  A Screenager is any toddler, child or teen that actively uses digital media or technology.  And while there are many wonderful aspects of our Digital Age, there are also many challenges that come with it!

Over the next three weeks, our goal is to equip and encourage you with information that will help you to better understand the significant challenges we face as parents, how to find proper perspective, not fear the challenges, and offer you practical ideas and suggestions to implement in your home.

For those of you in the Denver/Front Range Area, we encourage you to join us (with your elementary age (9+) and older children) for our Screenagers Event on October 16th.  You will get to view this award-winning documentary and come away with a strategy for your family based on many of the topics we will be addressing in these three letters!

Playing with Fire

Intuitively we know there are some significant challenges and obstacles with parenting in the digital age.  Often we will see, hear, or read about some of the various dangers and feel like those sensationalized reports will never touch our family – Cyber bullying, online predators, kids spending 11 hours a day playing video games, etc… But the truth is we are playing with fire!

Fire, like technology, is incredibly useful and essential to our way of life.  Yet, at the same time it is incredibly dangerous if we are not fully aware of the hazards.  There are three areas of that we think parents should have a general understanding and heightened awareness as they begin to form their perspective and digital game plan for their families.  *Please see our references and context note at the end of this letter.

1) Health Effects – Brain Development, Melatonin & Dopamine

During childhood, young brains are growing and developing.  Neuroimaging research and studies show us that cumulative and excessive screen time damages the brain.  “Gray matter atrophy (shrinkage or loss of tissue volume where ‘processing’ occurs) can affect areas including the important frontal lobe, which governs executive functions, such as planning, prioritizing, organizing, and impulse control (‘getting stuff done’)”.

Recent studies at The University of Colorado, find that a lack of quality sleep can lead to obesity, metabolic syndrome, mood disorders, and cognitive impairment.  And in their most recent report in the Journal of Pediatrics, the authors of the study “…found when adults and school-age children were exposed to the same amount and intensity of light, the children’s melatonin levels fell twice as much.   Studies also have shown that short-wavelength “blue light”—ubiquitous in hand-held electronics—is particularly potent at suppressing melatonin.”

Dopamine is an organic brain chemical messenger (neurotransmitter). It helps to control the brain’s reward and pleasure centers. Receiving “likes” on social media and “winning” a game can release high levels of dopamine that can cause us to become Digital Addicts!  In his NY Post article, Dr. Nicholas Kardaras says, “We now know that those iPads, smartphones and Xboxes are a form of digital drugs. Recent brain imaging research is showing that they affect the brain’s frontal cortex — which controls executive functioning, including impulse control — in exactly the same way that cocaine does. Technology is so hyper-arousing that it raises dopamine levels — the feel-good neurotransmitter most involved in the addiction dynamic — as much as sex.”

53% of kids feel addicted to their mobile devices – USA Today

2) Safety Issues –Cyber Bullying, Identify Theft, Online Predators

Unlike schoolyard bullying in the past, cyber bullying is much more harmful and pervasive.  According to research, more than 70% of children will experience a form of cyber bullying before they reach college.  We read every day the effects this has on our children from insecurities, to depression and suicide.  We personally know of two young people that have attempted suicide in the last few years because of cyber bullying.

On average, 1.3 million children have their identity stolen each year with 50% being under 6 years of age.  One of the biggest concerns is when children open accounts online.  This could range from a simple online profile they create to actually setting up a charge account for in app purchases.  We know one family whose child “borrowed” mom’s credit card to set up an online account only to discover that this not only put their child’s identity at risk by also the parents!

Online predators are not just strangers wanting to engage with your child, but can also show up as pornographic ads or other undesirable marketers wanting to connect with whomever is online.  We clearly remember a time when we were online with our boys, looking for sporting equipment, when a ”search” for Dick’s Sporting Goods yielded much more than we wanted!

70% of children have encountered pornography on the Web accidentally – Kaiser Family Foundation

3) Behavior Complications – Moods, Empathy & Relationships

It may not be surprising that digital media effects your child’s behavior in terms of moods, empathy and how they relate to others.  Researchers tell us that excessive screen time can,  “cause damage to an area known is the insula, which is involved in our capacity to develop empathy and compassion for others and our ability to integrate physical signals with emotion.”  Additionally, an article from Psychology Today sites that, “Attention spans are decreasing because of exposure to excessively stimulating and fast-paced media. A direct link between exposure to media stimulation and Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) has surfaced from research.”

Your child’s emotional health and behavior is directly related to the amount of time they spend on their tablets, phones, game systems, and computers.  As parents of two boys, we have witnessed firsthand how they respond to us when they are overly engaged with their media versus when we “fast” from media for a week.  They are less moody, more empathetic in conversations, more teachable, and a lot more focused.

“It can be difficult to resist screens in today’s hectic world, but isn’t it worth it if your child is calmer, happier, more focused and better able to handle stress?” – Janice Kowalski, MD

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Knowledge, awareness and understanding is powerful.  This is why we wanted to provide you with this summary of valuable information.  In our letter next week, we will hear a compelling story from a young teen boy, in his own words, about his struggle with technology and the downward spiraling tendency that can lead to addiction.

Blessings to your family,

Shelly and Rich

CLICK HERE to attend our Screenagers Event!

*At the risk overloading you with too much research and information, we’ve taken the liberty of paraphrasing much of the information in order to provide you an overall concise picture of the impact digital media is having on us and our children.  Here are links to some of the main articles and studies we mention in our letter:

Psychology Today – Gray Matters: Too Much Screen Time Damages the Brain

UCDenver: New sleep study findings fueled by CTSI

Digital Media and Sleep in Childhood and Adolescence

It’s ‘digital heroin’: How screens turn kids into psychotic junkies

As always, please feel free to contact us directly if you wish more information on our sources and research.