Parenting through the hubbub of the holidays can often leave one craving some downtime, taking the foot off the gas pedal of busyness and obligation, and just chilling with a warm mug of leftover Christmas glögg (Swedish warm spiced wine). Maybe after carving the ham, you can carve out some time before the New Year to think about the coming year.

The fundamentals of life envisioned and acted upon, lead to growth, well-being, and happiness. What could be more straightforward? Well…we need reminding. We need encouragement. We could use coaching. One of the great things about parenting is one must simplify life in order to write it on the next generation’s open calendar. And so in parenting, you start teaching about the fundamentals, the building blocks to accomplishment.

Study after study has established the reality that children thrive in an organized life. Helping them create habits that become life-long success principles is not much more than getting them to connect the dots between putting forth sustained effort on life skills. So how about during the downtime between Christmas and New Year you create a plan for you and your kids for 2024? What would you like each child to accomplish during the year? In personal habits? In health? Socially? Mentally? Spiritually? Music? Sports?

Devising a calendar will help to reinvigorate the effort every week. “Bobbie, you did great last week. Let’s preview what’s on the schedule for this week!”

Health – We start here because it’s easiest to describe, particularly in these days of sitting and playing games. The health topic offers areas to learn about –eating right, limiting sweets, moving, stretching, and water consumption. Lots to learn about with the body. It’s also something the whole family can do together. Maybe picking an event in the future, like a 5k run, that requires prolonged effort but isn’t impossible whether prepared or not, is a doable goal. That’s easy to put on a calendar. It doesn’t have to be running, certainly, but something that requires calendaring and sustained effort.

Mental –Taking care of the brain (limiting sugars, drinking water, eating greens) addresses the health perspective. Activities, like working muscles, are about learning new things, and stretching one’s existing understanding and perspectives. Reading, of course, is the easiest way to explore the world and learn about its fascinating features. How about reading a book and telling the family about the story? Think how this would add up over a year’s time?

Personal – Hygiene (teeth brushed morning and night, hair and body cleaned regularly), cleanliness (room straightened, games picked up), time awareness (being on time for school, etc.). Can you identify areas needing improvement and create a box to check on the calendar?

Relationships – Words of Life, speaking positively towards others, particularly siblings. Playing nicely, meaning not losing self-control. Letting young children play along. Every birthday, go around the dinner table and have each person say what they admire about the birthday boy/girl.

Spirituality – If you go to church now, putting a plan together for your kids is fairly straightforward – take them to church, have them read the Kid’s Bible, pray with them at bedtime, etc. But if that’s not your thing, you might want to reconsider. Everyone shares the raising of children with society – friend groups, school, social media, and others. Bringing a God perspective into family life and morality provides a less risky path forward. A church community certainly has its issues but harnessing the overall long-term value of the Fruit of the Spirit – Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Generosity, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self-Control (Gal 5: 22-23) against the corrosive aspect of society’s values is an aid to parenting and helps during the challenging teen years.

Sports, music, other activities – By looking at the whole year, it will help you to not overschedule. 2-sport or 3-sport children sounds great, particularly if they’re gifted athletes. But the cost to everyone else and, importantly, to family cohesion can be identified, and maybe reduced, in a calendar exercise.

Here’s the thing, you’ve been here before. You know how year’s past have gone. Declaring New Year’s Resolutions has limited value. Most of the time, the willpower ends by early February. But by investing a little yearend time to organize your children’s life skill development, it becomes more ingrained in the weekly routine. Joining them and modeling how to succeed will benefit everyone. Sustained effort is the key to a successful life – it’s easy to do.

To a rewarding 2024!!

Lis and Dave Marr

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