Besides creating a loving, safe environment to grow up in, what is the top skill a parent can teach a child that will absolutely ensure the best possible chances for success in life?
There was a study done that provided clear evidence that the home conversational environment for a child dramatically affects their academic future. And their academic success in life dramatically affects their economic success in life. The study was documented in a terrific book: Meaningful Differences by Betty Hart and Todd Risley.
The question the study intended to answer was about the acquisition of language of 1-3 year olds in various households. 42 families were categorized into 3 economic classes of high-income (13), middle socioeconomic (10), families of low socioeconomic (13), and families on welfare (6). The observers recorded every single word spoken to and near a child and counted every interaction, or turn, between the household and the child. In recording they could count the number of words, qualify the types of words, and count the turns exchanged among the members of the family and the child. This study was conducted over a 2-year period. The researchers followed up in 5-year intervals to assess the child’s academic achievement. Each of the 3 categories of wealth contained all races, ethnicities, and religions in order to eliminate those sorts of factors.
The results were startling. “Children from families on welfare were provided half as much experience as children from working class families, and less than a third of the experience given to children from high-income families. In other words, children from families on welfare heard about 616 words per hour, while those from working class families heard around 1,251 words per hour, and those from professional families heard roughly 2,153 words per hour. Thus, children from better financial circumstances had far more language exposure to draw from.”
As you would intuitively conclude, those children thrived in school where their home environment continuously introduced a steady diet of words rich with description and engagement. It’s not hard to understand why. The book explains that it takes a great deal of energy to code and decode words. If two children were side by side in school and one child already knew that a “hippo is gray, muddy, and large” and the second child doesn’t even know what a hippo is, then the second child has to understand and code a new word before contributing. That takes lots of mental energy. If day after day that child is not able to keep up because they have to code new words, it’s easy and understandable they’d drift off from the conversation. Academic confidence is built on little successes.
After years of reinforced experiences on the ease or difficulty of mental challenges that stem from coding and decoding words, you can see how the children, who come from wealthier families where the larger vocabulary is the norm, succeed meaningfully over children who come from families where less words and interactions are experienced.
There are lots of implications to this study. You can buy the book and dive deeper into the study itself, which would be worthwhile, but the conclusion is clear – if you want your child to succeed in life – Talk with them. Read to them. Engage with them. Ask them to respond. Vary your input. Describe life in all its colors and shapes, all its variations of sights and sounds, all its wonders of feelings and desires, all the richness of numbers and music, science and art. The English language contains 171,00 words of which the average adult knows about 20,000-35,000. The average 4 year old knows about 5,000. The 1st grader from a home poor in language knows only 2500 words whereas the professional families know and use 3x’s as many words. You can see the generational legacy words have. Here’s a key: What differences also exist in words about love, safety, being valued, and optimism towards life? For more on the neurological impact of the type of words to use, please reread our Letter on “Words of Life”.
One of the implications we have noticed is the impact screens have on families. Screen time – on the smartphone, iPad, computer, or TV – reduces family interaction. The study noted that screen time is no substitute for family interaction. A child’s learning increases when new words are introduced by family members at a much greater degree than when with a screen. Further, just observing families at a restaurant using their smartphones is more evidence that learning is not taking place (personal beef, not from the book). Shelly and Rich Howard’s Letter iEverything delves a bit deeper into this issue as well. For local families in Colorado, please join us for the upcoming event “Screenagers” on April 17th at Cherry Hills Community Church for a more in-depth look at the impact screens have on our children. Click here for tickets and more Information on this OneFamily event.
Parents are busy – No doubt. Today’s modern life is crammed with choices/demands of work, child events, church, homemaking requirements, and on and on. It takes energy to design the intellectual growth of your child. It’s easy to assume it’s going to happen anyway. As school begins for your child, it’s even easier to outsource their growth path to someone else. But your child’s God-given potential is influenced by you more than any other. And that influence is delivered with daily intentional packages of love called – words.
We hope our words of love inspire you toward more intentional verbal interactions with your children today.
Many blessings to you and your family,
Lis and Dave Marr