We at OneFamily never want to be political. If you listen to the shrieking sounds coming from the media, the world is falling apart. We totally get the heightened anxiety that might exist for parents – masks, CRT, COVID, immigration, war. We don’t want to be just one more shrill voice expressing our opinion on what’s wrong. Instead, our aim is more urgent than ever to do what we already do – support, encourage, and sustain parents in all the topics of parenting life. But, unfortunately, the world sometimes barges unwelcome into family life. Therefore, we must stay true to you with the belief that regardless of how difficult the topic, we’ll address it with as much sensitivity as we possess, but address it nonetheless.

We fervently believe that you can “protect” your children from “The World” with the overwhelming resources at your disposal. The global problems mentioned are small compared to the normal risks of childhood. You can protect your children from suicide, violence, drugs, and, yes, bullying. Each of these issues are sociological problems that manifest in and around young kids who are not fully “protected” by mom and dad. We know what creates risk in society. We know what reduces risk. You can protect your child by reducing risk in the right areas that you have control over.

What do you have control over? At the absolute minimum, you can control how you speak with your child, how often you speak with your child, and what you say in engagement with your child. If there were the possibility that violence, suicide, drugs, alcohol, or bullying could be a part of your child’s future and the antidote was your engagement to him/her, wouldn’t you do it today and every day till the risk was gone? You can’t start early enough to build stability in your child’s life.

Every life has turbulence. When a child is still developing their sense of self and are fragile, a turbulent home life makes that development more challenging. If some person at school decides to make themselves feel big by picking on that fragility, what is barely held together can fall apart. How can you protect your child then? Yes, by being there. By continuously checking in. By making sure that regardless of the storm elsewhere, your relationship is the calm. A line we used with our teenagers – “Of all your friends that might give you advice, which of them loves you more than we do?” “Which of them has seen more of life than we have?” That was our response to Gary and AnnMarie’s idea that “Ultimately, peer pressure on a child is only as strong as family identity is weak. Work early on building a strong family identity.”

Yet that might not be enough. You may need help. There are resources designed to educate you.

Friends has programs on bullying: https://friendscolorado.org/
Rachel’s Challenge does as well: https://rachelschallenge.org/about-us
Colorado.gov has suicide prevention information: https://www.colorado.gov/pacific/cdphe/youth-suicide-prevention
And violence prevention: https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/youthviolence/schoolviolence/prevention.html

How do you protect your child from risks of the world? The likelihood of bullying, drugs, and extreme violence is very small. A much larger risk is one where your child’s choices puts them in harm’s way. And THAT is where your influence is a difference-maker and where you can protect them.

And, as always, we are here for you to answer any questions, support and pray for you and your families, and offer more tools for your parenting toolbox through our upcoming Fall 2021 OneFamily’s marriage and parenting classes and workshops!

With blessings,

Lis and Dave Marr