“Every day is Valentine’s Day!” is the usual quip Rich jokingly says to Shelly EVERY Valentine’s Day. Yet, joking aside, it does lead to a very important question. Are you intentionally expressing your love on a daily basis and is it being received effectively? Or is it only intentionally expressed on special occasions… like Valentine’s Day? Simply saying “I love you” every day is nice, but sometimes it’s meaning can easily become diluted and be [...]
Genuineness. Authenticity. Intentionality. Being real. These are qualities that we look for in others. Our daughter went on a date recently. At the restaurant, this young man she was with was intentional in asking the waitperson’s name and treating them as a human being. No other arrow he shot that night could have been more accurate in reaching our daughter’s heart than this genuine act of humanity. But why? Why would that simple act of [...]
This past weekend we celebrated Alex’s 18th birthday. While we enjoyed laughing, celebrating and reminiscing about his 18 year journey, we were also reminded of our own parenting journey and two important perspectives we have learned through the years. Parenting is process Wouldn’t it be great if you could tell your children something once and they would fully comprehend the meaning of everything in your instruction. Like, telling your kids to “play nicely” and they [...]
Written by Shelli Marr, 27, Lis and Dave’s daughter “You want me to do what??” I asked, suddenly aware of just how high off the ground I was. “That’s right”, he replied, “close your eyes, cross your arms across your chest, and fall backwards.” He smiled a little as he said it, so easily reading the skepticism in my face. “Don’t worry, I’ll catch you”, he said reassuringly, even as he gently guided my shoulders [...]
Do you give your children the freedom to fail or make mistakes? Or more appropriately, do you allow them freedom to grow with personal responsibility and ownership? Whether you are a child or an adult, failure is not failure if you learn and grow from it. As parents, it’s especially difficult for us to see our children suffer frustration, experience emotional pain or the discomfort that comes with failing or making mistakes. However, in order [...]
“When little people are overwhelmed by big emotions, it’s our job to share our calm, not join the chaos.” L.K. Knost When your little children go off to elementary school and create friendships that introduce them and you into a new world of community, it is truly a joy to see them play and bond with others. Little birthday parties, sleepovers, sports – all contribute to a terrific time in the development of your children, [...]
As you know, we’re all about encouraging you to think about things you can do to positively affect the wellbeing of your family. So instead of just saying “Hey, take some time to write down your goals for 2018 during couch time” or something like that, we want to give you an idea that has been an absolute difference-maker for the Marr family. Dinner time discussions. If we were to list the things that made [...]
“Mooommyy! Mooom! Mommy, can Stevie spend the night?” our little 5 year-old asked as he ran up the stairs with his friend in tow. “I’m sorry sweetie, but not tonight.” “But whyyyyy?!” “No. Not tonight.” No reason? Just a rejection? Doesn’t that seem a bit harsh? Wouldn’t it be better to explain why his friend couldn’t spend the night or at least throw out another possibility? No, this was a scene that had played out [...]
Let’s say your 12-year-old is asked to go skiing with a friend’s family. It’s expensive, about $75 for the ticket, plus overpriced food. Since the parents of your son’s friend knows it would be a burden, they graciously offer to let your son use a season pass they have that pictures their other son who is not going. What do you do? Is it a no brainer? Do you take their offer and save the [...]
Blah. Blah blah. Blah. Blah, blah, blah! This is the sound or noise that children, spouses, and friends hear when we try to communicate during times of conflict. Meaningful conversations and effective communication never occurs when people are angry, frustrated, exhausted, feeling defensive or mentally preoccupied. You cannot teach a child the principles of self-control while they are having a “level 10” meltdown in the grocery store. Nor can you discuss marital issues (parenting, finances, [...]