(Today’s Letter is from Dave’s perspective) You can only teach what you know. You can only lead others to a destination you’re willing to go yourself. My wife offered this: “Dave, when you drink whiskey, you change. Not when you drink wine or beer, but since you don’t drink much hard liquor, when you have whiskey, you’re different. And I don’t think it represents who you are.” I struggled. Here we were at a nice [...]
We recently read about an idea that really resonated with us. It described how children need their parents’ blessing. A blessing from mom and dad communicates unconditional acceptance and affirmation while greatly impacting a child’s identity. Your blessing frees their hearts and minds to grow into all the good things you as a parent want for them. For Dads, its especially important to know the impact your blessing has in the lives of your children. [...]
Parenting is a year-round process. However, we found that summertime seemed to be a really productive and effective time in our parenting. Maybe it was because many of the school year obligations and hectic schedules got dialed back and the excitement of sunshine, family vacations and barbecues filled our home. Whatever the reason, we used our summertime excitement as a special time of the year to “super charge” some of our parenting initiatives while enjoying [...]
As parents we will be faced with having to discuss difficult topics and issues with our children. Whether it’s school violence, a family illness, the loss of a beloved pet or a death in the family, the depth and breadth of such topics can leave parents overwhelmed as to how to navigate these challenging waters. From our own experience, we’ve found that these tough topics are best addressed in three distinct ways: In the moment, [...]
The tragic STEM school shooting here in Colorado fills us at OneFamily with a sense of urgency. We totally get the fear that this seemingly senseless act has caused parents. We don’t want to be just one more shrill voice calling for someone else to DO SOMETHING. We feel the urgency to do what we already do – support, encourage, and sustain parents in all the topics of parenting life. And, unfortunately, this has become [...]
Potential. Although we have a vague idea of what unlocked potential might mean, it is very clear what locked potential looks like - An intelligent teen that struggles with emotional instability; a gifted athlete who lacks motivation to try; a talented musician short on courage to perform; a disabled child who needs special attention. These types of examples create frustration for us observers who can envision what a joyous life they could have if they [...]
There are a million YouTube clips showing babies, toddlers, young children and tweens imitating adult behavior, speech and attitudes. While some of these clips are cute or even hilarious to watch, some are very inappropriate when you consider the child’s age. It makes you wonder if some people are not aware that it’s their own behavior that’s being imitated. Lis and Dave addressed the issue of role modeling and shared some terrific insights on how [...]
What is a daily occurrence that happens between us as parents and our children that plays a significant role in their development and maturity that, if we knew we were underperforming, we’d change immediately? At or With? There is an immense difference in effective communication when mom or dad attempts to connect with a child with something of value – instruction, love, corrective discipline, or just conversation; versus when they read from whatever script exists in [...]
Every one of us has been on the receiving end of being wronged, injured, bumped and bruised physically, emotionally, and psychologically. Alas, we have all too many times been on the giving end of causing harm or offense in some way, large or small, by accident or on purpose, thereby injuring a relationship. That’s just the way of it – Life doesn’t allow us to progress very far without reconciling when we cause a break [...]
Have you ever been asked a question about the very thing you just communicated and you can tell your message is not getting through? We’ve all been there and it can be frustrating. Active listening may be a “blind spot” for those we are speaking with and for us as the listener as well. If you’re honest, when was the last time you intentionally listened in order to comprehend meaning, to show love and honor [...]